They say do something you are afraid of, to get out of your comfort zone. I have friends who’ve gone skydiving. Another friend sold her belongings and packed up in a trailer and headed out. I’ve gone indoor rock climbing with a friend equally terrified of heights. I’ve also volunteered for Riding for the Disabled to both help kids find joy and address my love/awe-fear relationship with horses. The fear, thanks in large part to a past life, but that’s another story, another timeline.
We are a constellation of beliefs and actions we’ve picked up as sponge-kids. This has obscured our connection to our own innate, collective, and cosmic wisdom. Some have shared that this subservience to authority can in part be sourced from DNA manipulation by the Anunnaki. What is all this talk about past lives, timelines, and ET? Well, bear with me and let’s see.
There is a saying that we see the world as we are, not as it is. [source] We all have our filters, depending on our upbringing, resilience, life experiences, constitutions, for example. They shape our perception. Our nervous system also reinforces our involuntary and voluntary responses.
We can call them our blindspots. It is also the box we live inside of. The thing is, we have not yet begun to comprehend the size and nature of this box. We don’t know what we don’t know. We can however start to unpack and unravel these beliefs, by stepping out of our comfort zone.
Polyvagal Theory & Safety
According to Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory, succinctly presented in Stanley Rosenberg‘s 2017 book Accessing the Healing Power of the Vagus Nerve, our autonomous nervous system has more than the two states we know of. It is not just “fight or flight” or “rest and digest.” When our nervous system is resilient and self-regulate properly, we return to the social engagement state whenever we are safe, feel safe, and are physically healthy.
As the name suggests, while in this state, we express prosocial behaviour. We are open, we bond with others, we care for ourselves and others, we engage – we experience life in positive ways. According to Stephen Porges, components of social engagement include care, compassion, and benevolence.
So perhaps a question to explore is how can we feel safe? In our bones, viscerally safe? A sense of safety is reflected in heart rate, perspiration, non verbal behaviours, and body cues. We may feel uncomfortable with another person, not always knowing why we feel what we feel. It may not be danger; it may just be that person reacting to a trigger. We are a feedback loop, and we can learn to better regulate our nervous system with someone who is, and to deeper our self-awareness.
We’ve all had experiences that have trigger our self-defence mechanism and a state of evaluation and vigilence. The survival mode is part of the evolution. How do we tone our system, to respond appropriately? There are many practices available, including Somatic Experiencing, the techniques of HeartMath®, Feldenkrais®, mindfulness, and Jin Shin Jyutsu®.
30-Day Challenge to Move Out of Your Comfort Zone
In renowned yoga teacher, author, and teacher Michael Stone’s prolific writings, I came across many helpful thoughts and practices. One in particular stood out. Perhaps because it closely reflects my own process. I’m suggesting this, allowing with a
So for the next month, I invite you to commit to the following :
- look at situations on a spectrum, rather than black and white, right and wrong, and other absolutes (from Michael Stone)
- focus on compassion for self and others and engage without sarcasm or complaints. Instead be present, practice active listening, and feeling ok with not knowing.
Doing something terrifying may trigger survival mode, contrary to how we want to feel, pitted against each other and the environment. I do agree getting out of our comfort zone can help us see our edges and inspire us to move beyond self-imposed and perceived limitations. Perhaps we can take this 30-day challenge by both feeling safe and moving out of the comfort zone to instil positive change?
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